Why I Stay

I have a degree in Biblical studies and humanities and I am currently one semester away from finishing a master’s degree in theology. This is not the easiest thing to lead with when I meet new people, but any sort of holding back ends up making me look like a liar. Even if I mitigate the bachelor’s degree by telling them that it’s a degree in humanities (see also, English), that only buys me a few seconds of time before they ask, “So what are you doing now?”

“I’m in graduate school,” I say, foreboding in my heart.

“Oh? What for?”

“Theology,” I say, because what is the secular equivalent of a graduate degree in theology? (spoiler alert: there is none)

“Oh. What will you do with that?”

That’s pretty much the end of polite conversation (Boyfriend says I should respond, “I’m going to frame it” but I never manage that in the heat of the moment). There are too many unknown factors to navigate the murkiness with a stranger. Does she want to know about my dream to move back to Atlanta? Does he want to be reassured that I don’t want to be a preacher? Does she want to hear that I have no idea what I will “do with that,” that I am lost, confused, and continuing on this path only by the grace of God?

Perhaps the most honest answer is that I am doing this out of love.

Love for God.

Love for God’s people.

And love for God’s church.

There are plenty of valid criticisms of the church in the United States. And there are plenty of people who claim to know why “millennials” are leaving the church in droves (you can probably find at least four different explanations in your Facebook news feed. Just scroll down a bit).

I’m not going to talk about why millennials are leaving the church. And I’m not going to talk about the criticisms, not today, at least.

Today I want to talk about why I am staying and why I think you should stay.

When I say, “stay,” I want to make sure that we’re talking about the same thing: I don’t mean I have managed to maintain my belief in Christ, although that’s important. When I say “stay,” I mean I have stayed committed to a local congregation of believers: the body of Christ Incarnate.

I stay because I know a church where most of the young married and dating couples are in interracial relationships.

I stay because I know a church who has committed that they will provide their promised support for their missionaries, even if that means other areas (like staff salaries) don’t get funds.

I stay because I know a church where the music minister can happen upon a lady crying on the church steps afterhours and be late for his dinner date to pray with her and offer advice.

I stay because I know a church who continues to let the 80 year old organist play because she loves to play the organ…even though she’s awful. I stay because they care about her more than they care about looking good for outsiders and newcomers.

I stay because I know a church that welcomes, supports, and encourages people who are struggling through their sexuality and gender identity.

I stay because I know a church that focuses on missions in February when other churches are talking about dating, marriage, and sex, because Valentine’s Day.

I stay because I know a church that allows a woman to bring her dog with her to Sunday services because she is still mourning her son’s death.

I stay because while the church has problems, there is so much to hope for.

I stay because I am willing to work to make a change.

I stay because the church will be around long after I’m dead.

I understand the criticisms, and I know what keeps you away. I know I have been fortunate to find loving and supportive churches to belong to. But they’re out there. Everywhere.

I stay because Jesus loves the church and I love what Jesus loves.